Trivia tourettes

Or – things I wrote on the train while half asleep this morning, following a weekend of heavy birthdaying. Mine, as it happens. I’ve been olded.

Trivia tourettes – the compulsion to spout flimflam at inappropriate times. When being sent down by a magistrate, the young lag would shout ‘there is only one breed of cow indigenous to the Northern Ensweer peninsula’, or ‘Poldark wasn’t real, although his dog was based on a real dog’ – as opposed to ‘that’s the third time you’ve sent me down, you rotter’. Which, of course, would be inadmissable as evidence. As would any of the cheap oakleys trivia he recited. Unless he perhaps came across the trivia will performing his offence – eg on reading the host’s New Scientist in the middle of a burglary, should he be caught short. Or becoming engrossed in Wikipedia while performing a Nigerian 419 scam or needing to refer to the 1996 Haynes’ Owner’s Guide to the Vauxhall Carlton in an attempt to hot-wire the vehicle.

Then the idea could be extended to Trivia Roulette – who could come up with the most obscure fact while still remaining broadly on topic. And then we’d all be employed by Radio 4 and be chums with dead comedians.

Of course most men of a certain age are well used to Trivia Top Trumps, aka ‘Going to the Pub’. My twenties would have been immeasurably more, um, quiet, had I not cheap nfl jerseys known and been rewarded with endless amounts of completely pointless information. It probably said something about my ability to retain this information that my role in the pub quiz team was generally to offend members of my team and think of the team name, occasionally at the same time. In fact, so regular was my capacity to cause offence and or random outbreaks of giggles that the landlord created a special prize for me to win each week (generally the contents of a Kinder Egg). Without this incentive, who knows if such winners cheap mlb jerseys as ‘Default Horse’, ‘My wee smells of nuts’ or ‘Fiona’s repeated Question 4 so many times that I have lost the will to live’.

Which leads nicely on to that much loved pub staple: ‘Ten things I hate about lists.’ I’m hoping to publish it in time for Xmas. Oh, my mistake, I’m hoping to publish shit in time for Xmas.

Which leads me to a theory of surrealism. After all, surrealism is simply Thinking Tourettes. Let us take a fairly standard premise – ‘you can take a horse to water but you can’t make him drink’. Well. There are many riddler-me-this reasons – the horse could be full, or the water may in fact be poisoned, or the water could be frozen. The correct answer, obviously, is that the horse is the reincarnation of Eleanor of Aquitaine, third wife of the fourteenth Duke of Burgundy. It is a well known fact (ok, it is a trivially known fact) that the Duke favoured throwing buckets of water over his spouse during foreplay, as he had been told off custom jerseys incessantly by his cheap jerseys mother for wearing wet clothes as a child. Thus the horse associates water with aristocratic jiggery pokery. And lo and behold, fish.

Let us take another – ‘it is a truth universally acknowledged that eighteenth century literature is much easier to dramatise because it is cheaper to sew corsets than to rent a Mk III Jaguar and drive fake oakleys it really fast round the wilds of Suffolk’. That is just pish – everyone knows it’s because the the authors’ are dead and you can’t be a good author until you’ve done a little dying. No-one liked Austen when she was alive. QED. AND she didn’t drive a Mk III Jaguar. Colin Firth be damned.

Which (finally, I hear you gasp) brings me on to Death. Or Life Tourettes, as I prefer to call it. Although sometimes that’s hiccups. Death by hiccups, the only way to go.

So, thought about death recently, stranger?

First and foremost, you can adjust the depth chart of your team. cheap football jerseys This means you can choose starters, second string and so on. There are many factors, including over saturation. The NFL may have owned Sunday cheap ray bans and Monday Night was a cultural phenomenon for many years prior to its being picked up by ESPN from ABC. Immunohistochemistry of paraffin embedded sections with VLCAD and MTP antibodies showed labeling replica oakleys of extraocular nerves. MCAD antibodies labeled extraocular nerves more strongly in frozen than in paraffin embedded sections. Butts is acriminologist at John Jay College and keeps track of the top challenges the leaders in the Forum’s sixmodel cities face in preventing violence. “Seventy percent of the ray ban outlet respondents across all six cities said that was aserious obstacle,” he said.. Females can withstand a bit more resistance from other male coaches than a new male coach. Females have fought against being denied the right to vote, have jobs in male dominated workplaces and the ongoing fight for oakley outlet cheap oakleys equal pay where male employees are involved. Notre Dame graduate, Theo Riddick, did his best Reggie Bush impression last season and figured to keep that position this season. Abdullah fits between these two styles. To avoid this problem, many rugby players consume protein supplements such as cheap nhl jerseys creatine, to prevent their fat intake from being too high. Wilkinson told the Guardian he likes avocado as a healthy source of unsaturated fat. She performed several critical experiments in space while in weightlessness and moving around the Earth at about 17,000 mph aboard the space shuttle. Cool stuff! Furthermore, she did not cheap fake oakleys fit the stereotypical 매일 description of female scientists.. One of the guys slipped them over the pulleys in the pathway of the broken belt and tied the feet together in a knot. He adjusted the tightener pulley a bit and they were able to drive to a garage for a Fake Oakleys real replacement belt.Can confirm this one is true. Right now you’re probably thinking to cheap jerseys yourself, “Wow, this is easy! I could definitely go at least 50 percent.” Therein lies cheap oakleys the problem. No sportsbook (in Vegas, online, or anywhere else) will pay you even money for a wager. Two years ago, there were just 46 seventh and eighth graders combined.Across the country, colleges are dolling out scholarships sooner, partly because the Internet increased the visibility of young athletes. Cable television also has proliferated the news of novice talent. But as easy as it would be to pile on Freeman after his poor play in the first three games, it’s not like the Bucs were much better in switching to rookie Mike Glennon. Glennon had a nice first quarter with a 6 yard touchdown pass. You will need to hire more employees in good times and layoff employees during slow times. There will be times when you’ll wonder how to pay your overhead expenses to stay open and if you can make your 941 employee tax payment to the IRS..

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