If I were to were to write an adventure for Tintin, I would definitely update Captain Haddock’s vocabulary. A little list, based on experiences over the last few weeks:
- Exploding donuts. When making your own churros, make sure to have a clear understanding of what you’re doing, or you will discover for yourself that donuts, once taken out of hot fat, have a tendency to explode if the dough wasn’t properly mixed. Or the oil was too hot / too cold / not Spanish enough. Anyhoo. These badgers go bang. And while it’s kind of neat, it’s also spraying burning hot donut insides all around your kitchen. And yes. As a boy I felt the need to test this phenomenon. Several times. Until I burnt myself. And it wasn’t funny any more. Nor was cleaning donut gloop off the hob hood.
- Headphones of productivity. I don’t believe these figured in any of the role-playing games I pretended to have enough friends to play with in my youth, but they should have done. There’s something about headphones that makes me get on with things. This is a bit disturbing. Perhaps it’s simply immersion in the task at hand. Perhaps my brain is the donut. Ole, as opposed to oil-y.
- Dental plans. You can take the catholic out of the church, but that doesn’t stop you getting cavities. Home win.
- Mental plans. You can take the teethies out of the mouthies, but you cannae make them talk, captain. They’re giving me everything they’ve got.
- Lambada, wherefore art thou? Rum baba, addis adaba, the dowager. Never in the news. Old news. History, even. Draw.
And so on and so on, son. Lots of stuff going on. But not a lot to say publicly.