And all the world is biscuit-shaped

I started read­ing a Susan Hill novel today. Now. She may be a lovely human bean. And tal­ented. And kind to ani­mals. And pos­si­bly, just pos­si­bly, a fan of 1930s motor­cy­cle goat­boy fan­fic. But. There is sim­ply no excuse for the words ‘ecto­plas­mic fog’ and ‘dre­icht night’ in the open­ing three para­graphs. Not enough to make me burn the book. But oh so close.

The last few days have been weird. I keep per­suad­ing myself I have no focus, which is my main excuse for never fin­ish­ing a . Sen­tence. I mean, novel. Writ­ing, that is. Not read­ing. I’ve read an appalling num­ber of nov­els I should have stopped. But what I for­get is that I’m stub­born. You don’t run marathons unless you’ve got a mule gene. And yet I’m eas­ily bored. All the run­ning para­phena­lia (kit, logs, spread­sheets) induce a state of hyp­no­sis / eupho­ria / dis­en­gage­ment. Which com­bine to cre­ate small peri­ods of OCD-intensity activ­ity. Sadly (well, for my lit­er­ary career) most of this energy is cur­rently entwined in lycra. Well, not mine, but I digress.

Run­ning. To run. To gam­bol. To poo­tle. To sprint until one is sick. It’s just glo­ri­ous. As are my legs. Shame about the rest of me. But any­way. Run­ning. It’s bril­liant. And despite all appear­ances to the con­trary, eas­ier to do than writ­ing. For me, at least.

And yet. When it goes well. It’s bet­ter than run­ning. Putting words together is the best high. Words put a grin on my face. Run­ning hurts shins at my pace. Sigh, that was a reach. I even enjoy the cor­po­rate writ­ing I do. It’s like act­ing — putting on a voice. Obvi­ously I don’t get to swear, or do the. Short. Sharp. Self-reflexive dif­fi­cult to read shit that I do on here. With or with­out puns. But it’s just fun. The flow of words. Feel­ing them whis­tle past your ears. The an-a-to-mical source of the sound (to quote my favourite lyric ever. Although the irony is I can’t remem­ber it properly).

Which leads me to the con­clu­sion that Marks and Spencers Vin­tage Cava is the new absinthe. I can’t account for the short sen­tences otherwise.

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