Inside the head of Minibus Milliband

The min­is­ter for trams. The clam of chow­der­town. The big cheese. Chief Mon­key of Golden Tri­an­gle. Elvis of our hearts. Princess of our jaffa cakes. The raisin of our dreams. King. Of. Cheese. A grin for all seasons.

Ok. So a long day being mildly tin­gled by pol­i­tick­ery. And obnov, feel­ing a teensy bit old. I haven’t held polit­i­cal office for ooh, 16 years. My last cam­paign was based on Dirty Harry. And revolved around how lit­tle I wanted to do the job. Naturelle­ment, this being Eng­land, I won. Ok, I didn’t win the last elec­tion, but I was elected on the same plat­form previously.

I got to play at being in the West Wing for approx­i­mately 3 nano-seconds this morn­ing. Real pol­i­tics is noth­ing like as fun as it is por­trayed. It’s like look­ing at your feet through binoc­u­lars. Famil­iar, yet not as fun as spy­ing on your neigh­bours. You know. If that’s the kind of thing you like to do. Per­haps Mil­liband could be made a min­is­ter for it. Ah yes, my mis­take, Mssrs Straw and Long are already in charge of that.

Sigh. Pol­i­tics. Poli-tics. Many man­ner­isms. Mul­ti­ple par­rots. Long day.

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